Crush

okla aku bosan dan nak release stress from assignment kejap. aaku rasa nak cerita abt one guy ni. okk aku kenal dia from twit kawan dia. dia brag la abt the guy ckp member dia tuh hensem but never posting any good photo on media. i pun tgkla his pic jujur i ckp my first impression was like 'hurm tak handsome pun' my taste sgt tinggi so i ikhlas ckp dia biasa je then kawan dia siap bg username ig member dia tu. i pun stalk la sbb i nak tgk dia ni handsome ke takk. sksksks. sbb ramai girls komen ckp handsome? also ada gmbr dia yg nmpk presentable ada yg nmpk biasa. so i stalk ig dia mmg betul tkde gmbr yg helok pun. then suddenly dia post gmbr baru yg helok nmpk face dia i was like omg he reminds me of my mom. sumpah sama! hidung, bibir, mata dia hmmm murung kejap. then time dia tgh hot viral and more than 100 comment on that pic i try la komen hoping that he'll reply and guess what? he replied me! i terus tegur kt dm surprisingly dia layan like legit he has ton of fans that time but dia layan je aque? one thing abt i mmg suka tegur and reply story org randomly just to make new friend & for fun purpose. then forget each other as day passed by. so our conversation first tu pun cam nyawa ikan maybe bcs he has too many dm to reply but i keep texting haih knpla dia layan je sksks. then i tanya dia mcm mcm from his liking to his life to his friends to his study life makin lama makin deep. non stop text each other normally aku akan ok bye gitu je. but after dia reply aku reply lg to other topic. btw im really good in pickuplines so mmg tk terkira la pickupline aku bg kat dia. smpi dia pun tanak jawab pickupline bodo aku hshshhshsh. makin lama i kenal his personality. its really a bonus when u have good looking and good attitude. i know that he's mmg pendiam but dgn member gila gila je. cam akula. then tak sangka dia fans ariana grande gak. also dia suka volunteer program cam aku gak cuman aku tk berapa aktif sgt lately. its really a bless knowing him. btw aku follow dia but dia tk follow aku so he's really has no idea how i look like. my ig private. then i send him my pic with my classmate but i cover my face then dia tanya knp tutup muka baru nak tgk hshshshs. then one day member dia yg viralkan dia tu twit lagi something abt ramai dm dia for sex purpose nak bayar for one night stand gitu la. idk maybe he's too handsome smpi org nak buat camtu kt dia. so i feel pity then tanya abt his condition. then dia tanya mana tahu abt that. i was like oh shit member dia post without his consent ke lahmak rosakkan conversation aku jeeee hahahaha. then aku ckp eh u taktau ke ur friend twit abt that but jgn marah dia bcs he's actually backup u je. takod akuuuu. then dia tak marah punnn. see. he's attitude sooooo calm and soothing. then lpstu dia request follow akuuu my sweetest dream ever & aku rasa dia suka aku tau hahaha sbb dia nak ajak aku keluar makan and sanggup nak amik aku dkt melaka like seriously?? my purpose just to make friend not to hookup. even aku suka dia that time but im not sure if aku suka dia just bcs everybody suka dia time dia viral or aku suka dia like a real feelings. bcs aku mmg jenis tegur stranger hi bye gitu. so aku takut dia suka aku but aku mainkan hati org. my friend pulak advice me not to mainkan hati perasaan orang and masa tu mmg tepat aku tgh breakout teruk peak breakout. acne scars sana sini, acne tumbuh weekly, and gain weight. thats what make me even low self confidence. for me he's really perfect. betula org kata bila kita suka seseorang kita akan rasa org tu sangat sempurna. so aku lg gelabah tetek dia nak ajak aku keluar but aku palau. aku confess iloveyou ttibe. argh idk apa yg aku fikir smpi berani nak confess camtu. then esoknya kot, dia post story "i think i like you too". i was like omg why babeh u should dump me. imma total potato. idk if he's pointing it to me but i think it's for me. so idk what to do i suruh dia delete all our conversations bcs i actually have a boyfriend and my boyfriend don't like u to keep our conversations. it's really heartbreaking for me to let him go. and dia seen je im sure he's shocked and think imma whore. dia tanya knp and disappear then. ifeel really stupid. it took me 6 month to sooth. until now i'll root for him even we're enemies now. i'll support him with his girlfriend. so i try to reach him few month ago in 2019 but he ignored me. then i use my business ig to text him and dia reply now he know me as aneesa but i think attitude dia berubah he's not friendly or jenis melayan anymore maybe he's affected with previous me. sumpah skrng susah nak sembang mcm dulu. i penah try to text anybody to forget abt him. but everytime i text other people it still remind me of him so i stop the conversation gitu je dgn org tu (like regular me). hmm i only can wait for his story ig to know his update. dia dah la tak selalu post kt ig! even i reply pun dia jawab sepatah je. hmm. then dia post gmbr celebrate birthday with one girl they're may babies that's why dorg celebrate together but i think she's his. murung kejap. takpela i support jeee. sayang tk semestinya memiliki kan. just want him to know that i'm sorry for my stupidity i never meant to break ur heart. i'm just lowwwwwwww confidence. u are sooooo ferfekkkk. pleaseeeeeeee be happy with your life, your girlfriend -,-